LIFE SUX BIGTIME!!!!

Hey there homies sorry for keeping you people waiting for soooo long for another post.......

I know I know you guys must have been really sad & wondering where the best blogger on earth had suddenly disappeared but sorry people I can't help it coz that'a how my life has been treating me these days.

This month has been really frustrating so if you people are in the mood for some comedy & jokes you better check one of the other links on my blog but if you are the types who take pleasure at the sufferings & misfortunes of other unfortunate mortals then this is the right place to be.

First of all I got screwed bigtime coz my mom read some of the really nasty sms that I recieve on my cell. What made matters worse was that they were from a girl and so I got a lecture on," How you should maintain some kind of distance from the opposite sex". Yah ohk whatever I convinced my mom that I also dislike such messages but can't help receiving them so I managed to save my skin.

Secondly some of you must have noticed my conspicuous absence from MSN messenger which isn't expected from a person who used to stay online 24x7. No people I am not sick it's just that my parents have got my internet connection disconnected & I am allowed to spend only 1 hr per week in the cyber cafe. This has actually made my life really boring coz I really enjoyed those late night conversations & some games which I discovered on MSN messenger;)

I decided to register for SAT which I believed would keep my parents happy," Chalo ab beta apne future ke baare mein kuch toh sochne laga hai". Everything was going on just fine when suddenly my friends told me that there was a trip being organised to Sitlakhet and that I MUST convince my parents to grant me permission for the excursion.What followed was the most stupid conversation I have heard in my entire life:

"Beta aapka SAT 3 din baad hai you won't get time to prepare....

Arrey English hii toh karni hai I'll manage, I'll start doing papers from tomorrow itself.......

Nahi aap trip pe thak jaaoge you won't be able to take the strain.....

What is that supposed to mean.........

You don't do physical work...

huh?!!

Aaj tak apne kapde kabhi khud press kiye hain aapko toh fruits bhi kaatne nahi aate.....

What does my skill in cutting fruits have to do anything with this trip.....

Apne cousin ko dekho he is DCE rank 200 and he can look after himself and even cut fruits & cook....

Mom it's an adventure camp not a cookery show........and I can cut fruits it's just that I don't ever feel the need to do it......

Yah right prove it......

Yeh lo I cut the whole watermelon now can I go............

No by the way who all are going.......

X, Y, Z & Q

No girls?!!

ummm A, B, G, K

oh so basically it's your 'gang' na?

WHAT GANG!!!!!

We don't trust you...

Huh what do you think I am gonna do huh?!!

Fine I don't want to go I am going to study for SAT and go abroad...Happy!!!

Of couse not why do you want to go abroad we want you to stay right here with us there are so many good colleges here in Delhi.......

Arrey I am not taking my SAT just to get into a college in Bhatinda........

Ohk forget it!!!"

Adults can be so wierd sometimes.......................so now while everyone is merrily discussing about the trip, I can do nothing but sulk.

" Abhi your IIT coaching test is on Sunday are you preparing coz we want good results this time."

"Yes mom I am doing the best I can!!"

So today I go and take my test........2 hrs Physics test which was quite decent. 2 hrs of Chem which was really good by my standards.....just 2 hrs of maths left & suddenly this person walks in & says that there has been a leak in the papers and they have scrapped the whole test so it'll be held next Sunday...........And mind you it's gonna be a lot tougher!!!

And to top it all I have butterflies and flowers drawn all over my school shirts which again is making my parents suspicious.......

WHY? WHY?!!!!

What has life got against me maine kya kiya?!!!

So for all I know this might just be my last post coz I am gonna commit suicide....

Antim sanskar aur Chauthe pe zaroor aana

RSVP Mom Dad n mah bro

Sadly yours

Abhi

On Popular Demand !!!

Neither the fiercest Lion, nor the deadliest Shark & not even the biggest Anaconda inspire as much fear in a man as this creature does. The creature that seems to have come from the darkest confines of hell itself, the creature that has stood the test of time surviving all calamities & hardships, the creature that haunts our dreams, our worst nightmare……..
By now you must all have guessed that this creature is none other than our very own cockroach that lurks in our kitchens & toilets. Never has any other creature been more repulsive (with the possible exception of Abhishek Bhatnagar) than the roach.
This nocturnal creature comes out when all of mankind sleeps, unsuspecting that this very creature might just crawl over their toothbrushes & poop there (remember that add?!!) or it might just do its business on that chocolate cake you left uncovered & which you would devour the very next day (along with those microscopic pieces of roach-crap on it) or better still it might just get inside your pajamas (mast na!!!).
You might stomp on it, crush it, kill it with insecticides but it’ll come back….there is no escaping the roach!! It might just be crawling out of the naalas that link your toilet to the drainage system even now as you read this……
But beneath that disgusting exterior I believe lies a heart of gold, a heart that beats like all of us, pumping white blood that flows in its body( Bio nahi padhi kya?!!) Behind all the grotesque stories & rumors that surround it, lies simply a pure & harmless creature that is just plainly misunderstood. Do you not love your dog?!! Do you not stroke your cat?!! Do you not play with those pet rabbits you have?!! Then why this discrimination against roaches? Doesn’t it deserve the same compassion that every creature on this planet deserves? It doesn’t ask for much. Not our love or compassion. It simply wants to live its life. Will you not let it?!!
S o the next time think before you stomp on that roach……..



Haan Maa kya hua??
Cockroach….. kahan??
Chilaana band karo I’ll get it!! CRASH
Man its fast…… SWAT!!
Watch out ma its coming right at you!!!
CRUNCHHHHHHH …. Mar gaya saala!!


Yah so what was I saying…..just think twice before killing it ohk!!

Disgustingly yours,

Abhi